35 Hoot-larious Animal Jokes for Kids

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Everyone loves a good laugh, so when the tension is high (test time, anyone?) and you want to get your students to relax, why not pull out one of our favorite animal jokes for kids?

From chickens to sharks, lions to monkeys … we’ve got something for all your animal lovers.

1. How do bees get to school?

By school buzz!

2. Why are teddy bears never hungry?

Why are teddy bears never hungry? They are always stuffed!

They are always stuffed.

3. What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?

What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper? “Ruff!” 

“Ruff!”

4. What is black and white and red all over?

What is black and white and red all over? A sunburned zebra.- animal jokes for kids

A sunburned zebra.

5. How do you fit more pigs on your farm?

How do you fit more pigs on your farm? Build a sty-scraper! 

Build a sty-scraper!

6. Where do cows go for entertainment?

Where do cows go for entertainment? To the moo-vies.

To the moo-vies.

7. What dog keeps the best time?

What dog keeps the best time? A watch dog.- animal jokes for kids

A watch dog.

8. Why do sharks live in saltwater?

Why do sharks live in saltwater? Because pepper makes them sneeze!

Because pepper makes them sneeze!

9. What do you call a horse that lives next door?

What do you call a horse that lives next door? A neigh-bor.

A neigh-bor.

10. What kind of snake would you find on a car?

What kind of snake would you find on a car? A windshield viper!- animal jokes for kids

A windshield viper!

11. Why are monkeys terrible storytellers?

Why are monkeys terrible storytellers? Because they only have one tail.

Because they only have one tail.

12. Why did the snake cross the road?

Why did the snake cross the road? To get to the other ssssssside!

To get to the other ssssssside.

13. Where do famous dragons go after they retire?

Where do famous dragons go after they retire? The hall of flame!- animal jokes for kids

The hall of flame.

14. Why are dogs like phones?

Why are dogs like phones? Because they have collar IDs.

Because they have collar IDs.

15. Why are fish so smart?

Why are fish so smart? Because they live in schools.

Because they live in schools.

16. What do you get if you cross fireworks with a duck?

What do you get if you cross fireworks with a duck? Firequackers!- animal jokes for kids

Firequackers!

17. How does a lion greet the other animals in the field?

How does a lion greet the other animals in the field? "Pleased to eat you."

“Pleased to eat you.”

18. What is a cat’s favorite dessert?

What is a cat's favorite dessert? Chocolate mouse.

Chocolate mouse.

19. What fish only swims at night?

What fish only swims at night? A starfish!- animal jokes for kids

A starfish!

20. What do fish do at football games?

What do fish do at football games? They wave.

They wave.

21. What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie?

What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie? A pie-thon!

A pie-thon.

22. Where do milkshakes come from?

Where do milkshakes come from? Nervous cows.- animal jokes for kids

Nervous cows.

23. What do you call a dog with a fever?

What do you call a dog with a fever? A hot dog.

A hot dog.

24. Where did the sheep go on vacation?

Where did the sheep go on vacation? The Baaaahamas.

The Baaaahamas.

25. How do you make a cow float?

How do you make a cow float? Root beer, ice cream, a cherry, and a cow.- animal jokes for kids

Root beer, ice cream, a cherry, and a cow.

26. What kind of bird works at a construction site?

What kind of bird works at a construction site?

A crane.

27. What does a fish say after sharing a new idea?

What does a fish say after sharing a new idea?

Let minnow what you think.

28. What do you call an alligator who solves mysteries?

What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?

An investi-gator.

29. What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?

What do you call an alligator who solves mysteries?

A carrot.

30. Why don’t leopards play hide-and-seek?

Why don’t leopards play hide-and-seek?

They’re always spotted.

31. What did the farmer call the cow that had no milk?

What did the farmer call the cow that had no milk?

An udder failure.

32. What sound do porcupines make when they kiss?

What sound do porcupines make when they kiss?

Ouch!

33. What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.

34. Why is a fish easy to weigh?

Why is a fish easy to weigh?

Because it has its own scales.

35. Why did the chicken cross the road?

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To show everyone he wasn’t chicken.

What are your favorite animal jokes for kids? Share them in the comments below.

Want even more jokes for your students? We’ve got them on numerous topics including math jokes, history jokes, science jokes, grammar jokes, and music jokes.

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25 Hoot-larious Animal Jokes for Kids



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